Friday, August 2, 2013

Why I Say Yes To Worship That Feels Like Family

This week has been theologically challenging. After reading a slew of articles and blog posts I found myself wrestling with some big questions. I had managed to find some answers and the wounds to my soul are currently healing. 
            Then this morning I read “Why Worship Shouldn’t Feel Like Family[i].” And surprise, surprise I found myself wrestling again. The article made my skin crawl.
            For me the image of church as a family is a huge part of my faith. As a product of a flawed and broken foster system I have always struggled with what it means to be family. Family was not a good word for me growing up. Family was my “f word.” It was a church that helped me redefine family, by doing some of the very things the article said not to do.  
            I will be honest that I don’t really have any thoughts on the first point that the article makes. I don’t really care how people pray as long as their prayers aren’t damaging to another person.
            Now, for the passing of the peace. I love the passing of the peace. I love it. Growing up I hated it. Now, I love it. It is my favorite part of worship. My first week at the church that helped me to redefine family, we passed the peace. And I was a nervous wreck. I didn’t really know anyone and I had had some bad experiences with the passing of the peace. I was waiting for someone to come up to me and judge me. But that never happened. The passing of the peace came to mean something to me. The passing of the peace, for me is not about excluding the outsider from the family. For me the passing of the peace is about welcoming someone into the family of God. It is about welcoming the outcast. It is about meeting a person in their brokenness. Never underestimate the power of welcoming someone to church.
            Now, for announcements. Seriously, you couldn’t find something else to criticize? Announcements let people know what your community is doing. I love when I go to a church and they have a long list of announcements that relate to work they are doing in the world. Announcements show visitors that you care about the world outside of the walls of the sanctuary.
            Number four pissed me off. Who cares what the soloist sounds like? So what if the person who reads the scripture is soft spoken? I’m pretty sure God doesn’t give a damn. God cares about people being welcome. God wants everyone to feel at home. I sing in church and I’m not very good at it. But here’s the crazy thing it all sounds wonderful to God. If our actions in worship come out of our love for our divine creator then who is to say that they are not good enough? To say that someone cannot sing or read scripture in church is anti-kingdom.
            And as far as I am concerned with number five use context clues. They are fabulous! And if someone has a question about where something is located just answer the question. I had no idea what a narthex was the first time I encountered the word, but I figured it out by asking. I also found number five to be belittling. People learn more about the god a religion worships by watching the people. I don’t understand the words to the hymns when I am at a Hindu temple, but I do know that the people there are welcoming. I know that they are active in the community outside of the walls of the temple. I know that they rock at hospitality.
            So, I guess what I am trying to say is church should feel like a family; a welcoming, nurturing family. A family that is over joyed when someone new shows up on their doorstep. A family that vacations to the worst parts of the city with blankets, food, hope, grace, and love. A family that is not afraid to welcome the homeless person to their table. A family that gets it.  A family that helps a foster child redefine family. A family where the only rule is “build kingdom”.




[i]Flowers, John and Karen Vannoy. “Why Worship Shouldn’t Feel Like Family.” Ministry Matters, 29 July 2013.  http://www.ministrymatters.com/all/article/entry/4093/why-worship-shouldnt-feel-like-family#.UffLMkJpU3Y.facebook

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